Photo Update

 

Haylee and Hannah celebrated their 12th birthday this month.  They had a mini spend the night party.  They each had a friend over to spend the night.  I was pleasantly surprised how well they did.  I had them all sleep in the den right outside my room so I could hear them and monitor things going on.  They were very happy and behaved very well.

 

 

 

 

Hannah got what she wanted for her birthday, an I*pod Na*no Touch. 

 

Haylee wanted an American G*irl doll.  She didn't ask for matching PJ's, but was beyond excited when she received them.  She wears them every night.  I have to make her bring them to me to be washed.   

 

Alex was just inducted into the National Honor Society.

(Tucker is already a member.)

 

Our family at the induction ceremony.  (My husband and was at work.)

 

 

 

My older three children were invited to a Sweet 16 party for a friend of ours.  They enjoyed dressing up and attending the party.  It is the first time Morgan has had the opportunity to wear a "prom" style dress.  Fortunately, we were able to borrow one from a sweet friend.  They were having fun taking

pictures before they left.

 

 

 

 

 

Haylee learned to water ski this summer.  We are very proud of her.

I get overwhelmed when I think of how far they have come in 3 1/2 years.

 

 

We went to a pumpkin patch and they enjoyed playing in the corn and the cotton. 

 

Morgan flying across the tires during our pumpkin patch trip.

The boys spent a week in August at a camp getting Scuba Certified. 

They loved it and are thrilled to be certified. 

 

 

Hello

Angela, thanks for checking on me.  We are doing okay.  One little one still has more issues than any of the other children in our house.  It makes it difficult some days in our home. 

I typed a post last week, but I haven't had time to finish writing it. 

I will finish it as soon as I sit long enough without interruption. 

Gotcha Day 2013

We were blessed by the addition of

Haylee and Hannah to our family

three years ago today. My, how they have

changed in so many ways in three years.

 

 

What an amazing difference!!

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter!

A New Driver

I can't believe my oldest child is old enough to have a drivers license.  I am very proud of him.  He is taking all of the kids to swim team this afternoon.  I hope I don't have a nervous breakdown!!

Father Daughter Dance

 

My girls went to the annual Father Daughter Dinner/Dance last night. 

They love dressing up and going with their daddy.

They had a wonderful time!

My how they have grown up.  I enjoyed looking back at this post
to see how they have changed.
 

. 

The sweet side...

I read this blog today, http://ouralabamaadventure.blogspot.com/.  Sharon wrote a great description of what we deal with as parents of older adopted children. 

You can link to the blog above and/or read a portion of it here.  This is what I wish people would understand about us instead of judging us.


One of the biggest frustrations we all face, though, is the judgement we get from those around us that don't understand RAD. And let me stop right here and say - if you have done this, don't beat yourself up - everyone does, you are not alone. Heck - >> I << did it, to other parents of RAD kids, before we got ours!!

But our kids' behaviors often come across as sweet and cute to those who don't know them well, or, even, sometimes to those who DO know them pretty well, but don't understand their 'issues'. And our responses, as parents, to those 'sweet and cute' behaviors will often come across as somewhat harsh. It's so tiring to know that people whom I care about sometimes judge me to be part of the problem because I am being 'too harsh' with them. It's a TOUGH style of parenting, and not our first choice of ways to have to treat them, but there are indications that it WORKS, we have SEEN it help in our own kids' lives, so we DO it because we want what is best for our kid. Please don't judge us.

It's also TIRING. And often people don't understand just HOW tiring it is, because when they (KINDly) take our kids for us for short periods of time, the kids are angelic! "What could possibly be so hard about parenting these wonderful children?" But the kids save their 'behaviors' for when other people are not around.

The human spirit is incredibly deeply programmed for survival. And when the psyche is injured at a young age, it becomes VERY defensive by nature and VERY capable of manipulating and playing the situation to it's best advantage. These kids are PROFESSIONALS at this process. They are generally very sweet in public and to those who they do not see on a daily basis. They save their 'behaviors' for those who are trying to get the closest to them, because, deep down inside, they know that we hold the most power to hurt them again. So they work VERY hard at making SURE we can not get close enough to have that power.


Also, Hannah is really wanting to see her birth parents to ask them some questions.  Our counselor suggested she start a journal of what she would like to ask them.  Of course, we are not going to allow her to see them anytime soon.  I hope this journal doesn't become a big ordeal.  She made a few comments about it last night that I am not sure how to take. 

When she first came, if she got in trouble, she would ask to call her foster mother.  We eventually ended that.  Now, if she is in trouble or in the middle of a punishment (ie: no TV) she will tell me she is going to write in her journal to her BP.

Update

Sorry I haven't posted in so long.  We have been really busy around here. 

We finally had Tucker's Eagle Ceremony.  It was a very special time for all of us.  Tucker is in the middle and his brother Alex is next to him.  I believe he will have his Eagle within the next year.

Haylee is trying contacts.  Poor girl, her glasses are so thick for her left eye.  We are trying them for 30 days to make sure she will keep up with them before we purchase any more.  So far she is doing great!  She loves not having to worry about glasses. 

Hannah is doing really well.  We went through a difficult phase, but we are coming out of it, I think.  She still struggles with nightmares.  She only grew one inch in one year.  We did hormone testing and she passed.  So, slow growth and no hormorne deficiency.  Interesting.

Some exciting news is that my parents have purchased a house in my city.  They have sold their house in the city three hours from us.  We are very excited.  My kids are very excited!  I am thrilled because I have never lived in the same city as my parents since I graduated from college.  I am sure they will be a big help to me.

Morgan had her 12th birthday.  I can't believe she is already twelve!! 

Overall, we are all doing well.  We are staying very busy, so I haven't blogged much. 

Tucker is preparing to take the ACT again for college entrance.  I can't believe he only has two more years before he graduates.  He will be sixteen in about a month.  I am not sure I am ready to have a new driver!

My husband is in his new office building which is beautiful.

This is Morgan's birthday cake.  She came up with the design from looking on the internet.  I think is turned out very well.

 

She and her friends made duck tape clothes, purses, crowns and earrings.  They were pretty creative!

 

Below is my mother and my new nephew.

 

My brother and his wife.

 

Tucker, my oldest son.  He just loves taking pictures.

 

Alex and Hannah

 

My dad and Morgan.  As you can tell Morgan loves pink and zebra right now.  The zebra blanket was a birthday give from a friend.  It has an M monogrammed on it. 

 

     My husband and Haylee without her glasses.  She is doing so well.  I believe she is attached and very happy.  She always keeps us laughing.  She is such a joy!

Movie

Last night we let the girls watch Oct*ober Ba*by.  We weren't sure if and when we would.  It just felt right last night.  I have felt like Hannah has been distant the last few days. 

Well, I watched the movie with them.  After it was over Hannah crawled up in my lap and cried.  My husband wasn't in the room.  She usually goes to him, not me.  She could relate to the movie so much.  The girl, Hannah, in the movie has so many of the same characteristics as my daughter, Hannah.  To name a few: name, MRI, EEG, Preemie, wants to find her parents, birthday in October and on and on. Hannah realized most of these.

She started asking about her birth parents again.  She said she wants to find them.  She wants to tell them about Jesus.  She asked why she can't go now. I told her it isn't safe or she would be with them now. She asked if I would help her later.  I told her when it was time, I would help her.  (I hope that was the right thing to say.)  I wonder sometimes if she saw them now, would it give her some closure?

While Hannah and I were talking, Haylee was sitting on the couch next to me.  I was able to see how each of them cope with their past.  Hannah was very emotional and the feelings were deep.  Haylee got silly and would say silly off the wall things to not think about what Hannah was talking about. 

Later, when I was tucking the girls in for the night, Hannah told me that she didn't think I loved her, but after watching the movie, she knows that I do.

I was bothered by her statement.  I was beating myself up about being a bad mom to her if she doesn't think I love her.  I was pondering this when it occurred to me that she doesn't understand what love is or means.  When she came she loved every single thing and person.  She has learned a great deal, but still doesn't get it.  I think her definition is probably someone that gives her what she wants when she wants it.  That sounds harsh, but that is how she thinks.  We are definitely not that kind of parents.  We have boundaries and they don't move.   She thinks everything should be equal no matter what.

This morning I gave her an example of how I showed my love for her today.  Yesterday, she asked for cinnamon rolls.  We usually eat those one morning each weekend.  Well, we didn't have any.  Last night I went to return some movies and also purchased some cinnamon rolls for breakfast.  I asked her what we were eating for breakfast.  She told me.  I asked what she wanted for breakfast yesterday.  She told me.  I asked her why we didn't eat them yesterday.  She told me.  I told her that I went and bought some so they could have them this morning.  I did this because I love them and know they look forward to eating them.  I explained to her that this is one simple way to show love for another person.  Doing simple things just because you love them and expecting nothing in return. 

I feel like that was a huge step between the two of us last night.  Hopefully this will break down some of the walls that has been built between us. 

Age

It is so hard to remember the girls aren't eleven in maturity.  Sometimes they are no more mature or developed than a five or six year old.  This is such a difficult situation when they want to do preteen things but they aren't ready to be a preteen.  They think they are so grown up and then make choices and follow directions as a young child. 

I pray very often that God will help me discern which age they are each and everyday.  It is definitely a moving target.

Speak Life!

This is a great song shared on a blog I follow.  Enjoy!

Growth

The girls had doctor appointments today. 

Haylee has grown almost three inches and gained eight pounds in one year. She is wearing a size 7/8 pants and a medium shirt.

Hannah has grown a little over one inch and gained 3 pounds in one year. She was on the lower end of okay last year.  She has now fallen below the acceptable line by quite a bit.  Hannah wears a small shirt and size 6/7 pants.

They just turned eleven a few weeks ago.

Hannah will have growth hormone testing in early January.

Hannah may have to be given growth hormones.

I always knew this could be a possibility.  I was praying that we wouldn't have to endure this process. 

The doctor said it is hard to get insurance companies to approve the therapy.  She said if they aren't producing the correct amount of hormones and are not on the growth chart they will usually approve the treatment.  I hope it will be approved, if needed.

Haylee is finally on the growth chart at 3%.

Hannah is not on the growth chart at all.

Please pray...

A friend of mine is in need of prayer for healing.  She is in the process of adopting from Russia.  She has made two trips already.  They returned from their most recent trip last week.  During this trip they had their court hearing and are officially the parents of their little boy.  They are set to return in November to bring him home.  However, during the night Monday she became very ill.  She is in ICU.  Last I heard, they weren't sure if she had a stroke or an aneurysm.  She needs a miracle in her body to be able to return to get her son.  Yesterday she was alert and talking.

My heart is very heavy for her.  Please pray for her. 

Art

Haylee took her first art lesson today.  She went for two hours and did very well.  The teacher said she sat very still and paid attention very well.  I could hardly speak when I went to pick her up and saw the painting because I was so pleased with her work.  Haylee has always loved any type of art and is very excited to have the opportunity to take watercolor classes.

I am so proud of her and love seeing how proud she is of her work.

He did it!!

I am proud to say my son is an Eagle Scout!!

 

Tucker passed the Eagle Board of Review tonight and is now an Eagle Scout!!

 

We had a great time tonight driving the hour to the meeting and the hour home.  He is such a fine young adult.

 

I am so blessed to have him as my son!

Family Picture

We had family pictures made Friday evening.  The photographer pasted this on Face*book.  I am excited and would like to see the rest now.

School

I guess I shouldn't have complemented the girls on how well they are doing in school this year.  It is now taking them forever to finish their school.  I assigned them less this week to see if we could get finished in a timely manner. 

I think they lost their math brains at our swim meet this weekend.  We had a simple review lesson on parallel, perpendicular and oblique lines this morning.  I drew each of them a line.  I asked them to draw a parallel line and a perpendicular line to the line I drew.  One didn't know what a perpendicular line was at all.  We had talked about it and looked at multiple examples before asking them to do this.  I then asked them to draw a set of each type on their own.  You would have thought I had asked for the moon. 

Oh my!!  I hope our day gets better and some people turn their brains on!!

Proud

I haven't posted in a while, so I will give you an update.   School has started well this year.  I am very proud that everyone retained math skills over the summer.  They were required to read this summer, but not do structured math.

I am very proud of how well all of my children are doing academically right now.  However, Tucker doesn't get bragged on very much.  So, I am going to tell you about what he has been doing.

Tucker is taking very challenging courses this year.  Anatomy and Physiology, Advanced Math, Writing Composition and Omnibus which includes logic, literature and history.  I am so glad I am not taking these classes because I don't know that I could pass them.  He is working hard and doing well.

Tucker has completed all of the merit badges and the service project to earn the honor of E*agle Sc*out. We are very proud of him. His service project was repainting the helipad at our local hospital. He has passed the local board so now he will meet with the district board for approval.  

I have included pictures of the project below.  The transformation is so neat for me to see.  He and other scouts worked very hard in the July heat completing the project.

 

 

The day they finished the project, the hospital representative arranged for one of the life flight helicopters to land on the newly painted helipad.  It was an exciting end to a job well done.  They also took a picture from the sky as they left and sent it to us.

 

Well, this post was going to be about everyone, but I spent it all on Tucker.  I will update on everyone else later.

Question

Do any of you give your child Mela*tonin to help them sleep?  I know some people do because I have read it on their blogs.  Haylee has a hard time going to sleep at night.  Last year we gave her prescription medicine to help her fall asleep.  We were trying to avoid that this school year.  Well, she is taking hours to fall asleep.  The other night she had been in the bed at least 1 1/2 hours when she got up complaining about not sleeping. 

I am not sure what dosage to give her.  Does it cause problems in AD*HD children?  A few of the articles I read online said to be careful giving to children dealing with AD*HD. 

Thanks for the help!

School

We started school last week.  Things are going well so far.  I am very excited that all of my girls have been able to complete the review work at the beginning of the math book.  I was very happy because other than life skills, we didn't do any math this summer. 

The boys have done well.  They have two classes that haven't started yet.  They will begin next week.  (They are group classes.)

Morgan is going to stay at my parent's house for a week.  We are going to their lake house this weekend and she is going to stay until the next weekend.  My mother had surgery on her hand and is off work for a few weeks so she is thrilled to have her.  They are having a garage sale the second weekend and Morgan can't wait to help.  She has wanted to participate in a garage sale for years.
I will send her school work with her and the answer keys for my parents.  I will miss her, but on the other hand, I am excited for her. 

I believe it will be a good thing for everyone.  The other girls struggle at first without Morgan around, but then they start doing better.  They are lost at first.  Actually, Haylee does pretty well.  Hannah struggles. 

Also, this was our excitement today.  Tucker killed a timber rattler in my front yard.  Luckily a friend drove by and saw it and stopped to let us know.  He went in some brush by a tree.  We sprinkled gasoline on the brush.  Very quickly, he stuck his head out and Tucker blew it up!!  He actually blew up his head and injured part of his body.