Thursday, August 19, 2010

Conference

The conference was great today. I could have listened to Kari much longer. She is a great speaker and really knows her stuff. I need to reconsider how I am parenting my girls. I think I will continue to use the things that are working, but change the obvious things. Ann needs something to do with her hands while I am teaching her. She is constantly trying to do something and I am always taking whatever it is away. Well, I need to let her have something. Kari mentioned putting velcro on her son's pencil or on the table. I may try it and see if it helps. It is an easy thing to try. She also has sand timers for all lengths of time. She suggested using them for children that do not function well with 5, 3, 1 minute warnings. My girls are not good judges of time. I think I will be purchasing them soon.

The meeting was worth the trip. I met with the head of the State Office of Adoption and I think since we have a diagnosis she is going to approve my requests. Yeah!! I was very thrilled. She told me before Kari started speaking. It isn't signed yet. I have to wait on the paperwork from the doctor we saw Monday. She told me she had an inbox full of emails from me with my data and research. I apologized and said I was told to advocate for my children and that is what I have done. She said she is glad and wishes more parents would. She said that I had obviously educated myself very well in a short amount of time. I am very happy and glad I came to the meeting. I am enjoying time at my parents with Alex and Morgan. Life is so easy now with only two. These two are easy. I can totally trust them.

Conference

I am head this morning with two of the children to travel to hear Kari Fletcher speak today. I am excited to meet her and to sit with all of the DHR workers and learn more about how to effectively discipline and teach my children to be all they can be.

Ann had an auditory processing test done yesterday and Beth will have it next week. I wonder what the results will be?

God is so good!!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

We have a diagnosis!

The genetic doctor said we have FAE. We were expecting this diagnosis. He is going to send a letter this week stating the diagnosis and the other items we discussed. I discovered this with the help of counselors early on in the placement. He is also concerned about other syndromes we may be dealing with. Ugh! Both girls had blood work done that will take about 4-6 weeks for results. A full body x-ray was done on Beth. He said we only had to do one child because they are twins. I am confused a little bit about this because they are fraternal. I may have misunderstood what he was testing for. Anyway, hopefully we will have results from x-rays pretty quickly.

This morning I received an email from Kari Fletcher. She is a well know advocate for FAE and other related disorders. We had spoken with her about a month ago about FAS and our children. She is speaking at a permanancy conference in our state Thursday. She was checking in with me to see if I would be able to attend. Wow! How cool of God!! The day after we get a definate diagnosis, I get an email from Kari. I called her immediately to find out the details and to ask her opinion about our diagnosis. She said the FAE kids are sometimes the hardest to parent. They have average IQ's and they often don't look affected. These kids often do okay until their early teens. They begin falling behind academically and have a hard time processing their difficulties as they get older.

So, after speaking with her I contacted my state worker and told her what information I received from the doctor and asked about the conference. Anyway, I have arranged to be at her conference with all of the state workers that make these decisions on Thursday. We will all hear the same info at the same time!! I am so excited. She spoke in May at our state foster parent conference and I was unable to attend. I can't wait to hear her speak.

I sent an email to the state workers which includes the decision maker for my assistance request. She replied stating she will re-evaluate our case after the paperwork is received from the doctor. Yea!! At least she is going to reconsider. Hopefully after hearing Kari speak tomorrow, she will reconsider.

This will hold up the finalization again. I am okay with this because we need everything handled before we finalize.

God is in control!!! He is bigger than any of this!! I am so blessed that he has worked out every detail so I can attend this conference three hours from my home!! Now I just need the strength and energy to make it through the week. Tomorrow I will be out of town again with Beth and Ann for different testing and orthodontic appointments. I am so glad we homeschool because it travels!!!

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! Philippians 4:13

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Hard

Ann and Beth have appointments Monday with a geneticist in a large city about three hours from us. The state didn't approve requested items because we don't have a diagnosis. We already had the appointment scheduled, thank goodness. The state notified us Thursday of their decision.

I am having to complete forms for the appointment on Monday. It is very hard for me handle my feelings as I read back over their birth records and family history. I have such mixed emotions. The feelings and thoughts are so different than four months ago. When I read the documents before, I knew the girls were ours, but didn't know them yet. They are now my daughters and this makes me angry as I read. How could parents make the choices they did when two precious children were involved. This is what addicitions can do to you. I wonder why things weren't followed up on by DHR. I can't change the past, I just have to deal with it and move forward. I will press forward reviewing their history as I prepare for our appointment. I hope we get answers and not receive the run around again. It is hard to find a person that will diagnose.

Ann sucks two of her fingers. We have tried many things to help her stop. We have painted a yucky polish on. It worked for a few days and that is all. We have been putting band aids on her fingers. When she didn't have them on, they went straight in her mouth. She said she only needed one band aid, so we started only using one. I discovered this morning that she has been moving the band aid so she can suck them. She was watching TV and I saw her with them in her mounth. I checked her fingers and she had moved the band aid up so she could suck them. I was not happy at all!!! Intentional defiance!! I know it is an addiction that she has, but she knew exactly what she was doing when she moved the band aid. I told her I would be putting the band aids on both fingers and I will check them. The other girls told me they could hear her moving the band aids at night. Ugh!! Her days of sucking her fingers are numbered. We are having an appliance placed in her mouth Wednesday so she can't suck them. I hope it works. My husband says she won't be able to take it out, so it should work. I hope so!!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Sisters...having fun!




A friend of mine sent me these cute pictures of the girls from the pool this summer. I thought I would share them with you. It reminds me that even though the girls argue and fuss, they really do love each other. Once again, I wish I could show their beautiful faces. When the adoption is final, I will be posting many pictures WITH faces.

What a glorious Day!!

Beth getting in the water to be baptized.


Beth listening as they are talking with her about baptism.

Ann getting used to the water. The heater must not have helped too much. Ann listening to the questions as they prepare her for baptism.


My husband and the elders praying over Ann after her baptism. They prayed for Beth also, but I didn't have a picture without her face showing.


Morgan about to be baptized. I love the way she is looking at her daddy.



Morgan is so happy about being baptized. She asked Jesus in her heart when she was 4 1/2 but never would get baptized. How neat of God to plan it so all of my girls would be baptized on the same day.




Morgan being prayed for after her baptism.


Before the girls were baptized, various members of our church body shared scripture and words God had given each of them. One thing shared by a friend of ours was the connection between being adopted into God's family and being adopted into our family. She reminded them they are all princesses of the King. It was so neat for someone else to share this with them. The friend is 19 and babysat Morgan for many years when she was younger. It was very sweet.













Sorry!

I will get the baptism pictures posted soon. I just haven't had time. Well, I started one time and loaded five pictures and then they disappeared. I haven't started again. I have some precious pictures.

We started school yesterday. T, A, and M did well. Ann and Beth struggled some. Beth is doing great so far today. She has "turned her brain on" today. It sure makes things easier on everyone. Ann is not focused today. We use office chairs in our school room so the height can be adjusted for each child. Well, after too many warnings, she lost hers because of the constant spinning and twisting. She almost ended up in her bed after I took it away because of the pouting and tears. Later, she was lying on the table...ugh! She got it together enough to make it to break. I am about to go teach more so we will see how she is acting. She will not get it back until tomorrow.

Please pray for us, we have some spiritual warfare going on with Beth. The world calls it something major, but we believe she has a music or praise and worship calling on her life and therefore we are having to fight for her. Please intercede for her and me as well as we fight with and for her.