We are wondering what the trigger is for Hannah right now. Is it Gotcha Day coming up on April 6th? This is the time of year when a lot of her losses occurred. She has committed basically the same offense for the third time in 5 days. She is struggling with respecting the boundaries of others. It may be walking through a closed door without knocking, writing on someone elses picture or putting on her sister's clothes without permission. However, it is getting more and more obvious each time. The punishment is getting a little bit worse each time also. However, none of the punishments have been that severe, in my opinion.
My husband and I are praying that God will give us the proper way to deal with the issues. We have talked about the punishment, but aren't going to tell her until after church what it will be. I am praying for a revelation during our praise and worship time today.
Showing posts with label trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trust. Show all posts
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Trust is improving
I felt God was leading me to talk with Hannah last night about some of her fears and the root issues behind them. It was like God brought a picture into focus for me about some of the fears she has displayed over the last two years. I talked with her alone for about thirty minutes last night. She wasn't able to tell me what had happened in her past that made her so fearful regarding the situation I mentioned, but she did start opening up with me about other things.
She told me about things she witnessed her parents doing and how they would copy those things as well. She has told me about situations like this in the past. She got very emotional and didn't want to share with me what they had done. She finally shared and like the other things she has shared it wasn't as bad as she thought. I explained to her again that she was very young and didn't know any better. It is not her fault and that I am glad she wouldn't want to do those things now. It wasn't nearly what I was expecting for her to tell me. She decided she wanted Haylee in the room for the rest of the story.
We called Haylee in the room and continued talking. It was a good conversation. I think Haylee has everything stuffed very deeply away inside of her. The look on Haylee's face was of disgust when Hannah told her what she had told me. It wasn't disgust at Hannah, but disgust at what they did. I am protecting my girls and not sharing the details here, but it isn't as bad as one might think.
I am glad they were sharing with me. It is amazing how resourceful they were as such little girls. I guess when a bad situation would come their way, they would do whatever needed to get help. They told me about stacking chairs and pillows so they could climb up high enough to unlatch the door to get help. Now remember, my girls are very small. At ten they are about 48 pounds and 48 inches tall. So, all these years ago, they were very, very small.
Haylee shared some not so pleasant memories about her birth parents with me. She rarely talks about her past. It was interesting the types of things she remembered versus what Hannah remembers.
I am glad Hannah knows that what she revealed to me isn't as bad as she thought. I believe as she reaches puberty she would have questioned her identity even more due to this issue. I reassured her that she is okay and to not worry about what happened. They were very young little girls.
I believe Hannah and I are reaching a new milestone in our attachment. I am very happy for each step.
On another note, I ordered Haylee and pressure tank top and a cushion for her seat. It is suppose to help with ADHD and sensory needs. I ordered a S and XS tank. She put on the S first and it was snug. However, she wanted to try on the smaller one. It was hard to get over her head, but she loved it and wanted to keep the smaller one. She has worn it all day today. We shall see over time if it helps meet her sensory needs.
We aren't able to get Hannah seen by a neurologist at our Children's Hospital three hours away because her tests were okay. My doctor still wants her to be evaluated. They are going to see if the pediatric neurologist will see her one hour away.
I want them to start in the therapeutic horse riding group we have here. Haylee has been approved by the doctor, but Hannah won't be approved until we see the neurologist. Haylee is very excited about starting. She loves horses.
She told me about things she witnessed her parents doing and how they would copy those things as well. She has told me about situations like this in the past. She got very emotional and didn't want to share with me what they had done. She finally shared and like the other things she has shared it wasn't as bad as she thought. I explained to her again that she was very young and didn't know any better. It is not her fault and that I am glad she wouldn't want to do those things now. It wasn't nearly what I was expecting for her to tell me. She decided she wanted Haylee in the room for the rest of the story.
We called Haylee in the room and continued talking. It was a good conversation. I think Haylee has everything stuffed very deeply away inside of her. The look on Haylee's face was of disgust when Hannah told her what she had told me. It wasn't disgust at Hannah, but disgust at what they did. I am protecting my girls and not sharing the details here, but it isn't as bad as one might think.
I am glad they were sharing with me. It is amazing how resourceful they were as such little girls. I guess when a bad situation would come their way, they would do whatever needed to get help. They told me about stacking chairs and pillows so they could climb up high enough to unlatch the door to get help. Now remember, my girls are very small. At ten they are about 48 pounds and 48 inches tall. So, all these years ago, they were very, very small.
Haylee shared some not so pleasant memories about her birth parents with me. She rarely talks about her past. It was interesting the types of things she remembered versus what Hannah remembers.
I am glad Hannah knows that what she revealed to me isn't as bad as she thought. I believe as she reaches puberty she would have questioned her identity even more due to this issue. I reassured her that she is okay and to not worry about what happened. They were very young little girls.
I believe Hannah and I are reaching a new milestone in our attachment. I am very happy for each step.
On another note, I ordered Haylee and pressure tank top and a cushion for her seat. It is suppose to help with ADHD and sensory needs. I ordered a S and XS tank. She put on the S first and it was snug. However, she wanted to try on the smaller one. It was hard to get over her head, but she loved it and wanted to keep the smaller one. She has worn it all day today. We shall see over time if it helps meet her sensory needs.
We aren't able to get Hannah seen by a neurologist at our Children's Hospital three hours away because her tests were okay. My doctor still wants her to be evaluated. They are going to see if the pediatric neurologist will see her one hour away.
I want them to start in the therapeutic horse riding group we have here. Haylee has been approved by the doctor, but Hannah won't be approved until we see the neurologist. Haylee is very excited about starting. She loves horses.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Praying
I am praying about what to do next with Hannah. As of now, I am going to get an appointment with a pediatric neurologists out of town. It may be six months before we can get an appointment. During that time I will watch and document these episodes.
I had her speech evaluated today and she was fine. The lady noted that she needed to work on eye contact. That is not surprising. We are always asking her to look at us when she talks.
So, it appears the stuttering and eye dilation are either the results of the fight/flight/freeze situation or a small seizure. Even though the EEG didn't show anything, we could be dealing with seizures. The characteristics can happen in either situation.
If it is all part of fight/flight/freeze, is that dealing with PTSD? Is this something I need to seek treatment for or just keep loving her and continue building her trust and security within our family?
Lots to think about...
I had her speech evaluated today and she was fine. The lady noted that she needed to work on eye contact. That is not surprising. We are always asking her to look at us when she talks.
So, it appears the stuttering and eye dilation are either the results of the fight/flight/freeze situation or a small seizure. Even though the EEG didn't show anything, we could be dealing with seizures. The characteristics can happen in either situation.
If it is all part of fight/flight/freeze, is that dealing with PTSD? Is this something I need to seek treatment for or just keep loving her and continue building her trust and security within our family?
Lots to think about...
Monday, February 27, 2012
Honesty
This is a conversation at my house tonight.
Haylee was playing with her Littlest Pet Shop toys when I asked her to take the dog outside. She told Hannah not to touch her toys while she went out. Hannah said she wouldn't. Haylee asked me to make sure she didn't touch them. I asked if this had been a problem. Haylee said that every time she asks Hannah not to touch them, she does, so she can't trust her. I asked Hannah if this was true and she said it was. (At least she was honest.) I told Hannah to sit on the couch and not move until Haylee gets back from walking the dog.
Ugh! Lovely. She stayed on the couch until Haylee returned and then watched Haylee play. Whatever...
Hannah has an MRI and EEG early Wednesday morning. A close friend that has been in foster care for years is letting Morgan and Haylee spend the night with her. I am totally comfortable with her keeping them. Hannah and I have to be at the hospital an hour away at 7 am.
I have a speech and OT evaluation for the girls next Monday. It may not be anything, but we are getting things evaluated.
Haylee was playing with her Littlest Pet Shop toys when I asked her to take the dog outside. She told Hannah not to touch her toys while she went out. Hannah said she wouldn't. Haylee asked me to make sure she didn't touch them. I asked if this had been a problem. Haylee said that every time she asks Hannah not to touch them, she does, so she can't trust her. I asked Hannah if this was true and she said it was. (At least she was honest.) I told Hannah to sit on the couch and not move until Haylee gets back from walking the dog.
Ugh! Lovely. She stayed on the couch until Haylee returned and then watched Haylee play. Whatever...
Hannah has an MRI and EEG early Wednesday morning. A close friend that has been in foster care for years is letting Morgan and Haylee spend the night with her. I am totally comfortable with her keeping them. Hannah and I have to be at the hospital an hour away at 7 am.
I have a speech and OT evaluation for the girls next Monday. It may not be anything, but we are getting things evaluated.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Attachment or manipulation??
I just typed an entire post and somehow deleted it....here we go again.
This may sound petty to some of you, but when dealing with hurt children, my view gets blurred by the manipulation.
Today, the twins were getting ready for dance. They wear pink tights and black leotards with their hair in a ponytail. Haylee comes out dressed with a huge blue sequenced bow in her hair. I tell her we aren't wearing that to dance and take it out. I think she had about four knots in the bow and two hair bands. (Sensory stuff??) I tell her I will help fix her hair when we get to dance.
Hannah walks in and looks very nice. I tell her she looks nice and she did a good job fixing her hair. It looked really good!!
We all load up to go to dance and swim team. In the car, Haylee asks if I will fix her hair at dance. I tell her yes; even though, I had already told her in the house.
We travel the five to ten minutes to dance and start unloading to go inside. Hannah asks me if I can fix her hair also. As I am getting out of the car, I turn back and her hair is down. I asked her why her hair was down, it had looked so nice. She said that it got messed up and the back was coming down.
Thoughts are swirling through my head as she tells me this. We all walk inside and the older three head to the pool for swim team. I take the twins to the bathroom to fix their hair. I asked Hannah why she took her hair down. The story I get this time is that she had bobby pins in the back and she didn't know if I would like them. What?? Why would I have a problem with bobby pins in the back under her ponytail. I never have in the past. The only thing I can ever remember saying about bobby pins was that they aren't meant to be worn in the front on top of your head, they are meant to not be very noticeable.
I fixed Haylee's hair for dance. I start fixing Hannah's hair. I asked her why she told me a story about why her hair was down when I would much rather her say that she would like me to brush and fix her hair because she likes it. I asked her why she feels she has to manipulate the situation to get her way. ( I realize she can't answer that question, but it is what I said.) She just continued to make up reasons. I told her to stop because she it just lying and going to get her into trouble. She kept trying to tell me different versions of the story. Of course, she says I am not and I didn't take my hair down on purpose. Explain to me how her hair can get messed up traveling 5-10 minutes in the car. She had even wet her hair at home when she was fixing it, so I know it didn't come down on its own. Haylee chimes in and says that Hannah just took it down, it didn't fall. She is the master at keeping a straight face and making eye contact when she is manipulating or lying. It is getting harder and harder to tell the truth from lies. She whines a little and says, "But Momma, I am not lying." It is so hard, because all of our friends believe her and say that she doesn't mean to lie. Obviously, I ignore their opinion.
This may sound petty to some of you, but when dealing with hurt children, my view gets blurred by the manipulation.
Today, the twins were getting ready for dance. They wear pink tights and black leotards with their hair in a ponytail. Haylee comes out dressed with a huge blue sequenced bow in her hair. I tell her we aren't wearing that to dance and take it out. I think she had about four knots in the bow and two hair bands. (Sensory stuff??) I tell her I will help fix her hair when we get to dance.
Hannah walks in and looks very nice. I tell her she looks nice and she did a good job fixing her hair. It looked really good!!
We all load up to go to dance and swim team. In the car, Haylee asks if I will fix her hair at dance. I tell her yes; even though, I had already told her in the house.
We travel the five to ten minutes to dance and start unloading to go inside. Hannah asks me if I can fix her hair also. As I am getting out of the car, I turn back and her hair is down. I asked her why her hair was down, it had looked so nice. She said that it got messed up and the back was coming down.
Thoughts are swirling through my head as she tells me this. We all walk inside and the older three head to the pool for swim team. I take the twins to the bathroom to fix their hair. I asked Hannah why she took her hair down. The story I get this time is that she had bobby pins in the back and she didn't know if I would like them. What?? Why would I have a problem with bobby pins in the back under her ponytail. I never have in the past. The only thing I can ever remember saying about bobby pins was that they aren't meant to be worn in the front on top of your head, they are meant to not be very noticeable.
I fixed Haylee's hair for dance. I start fixing Hannah's hair. I asked her why she told me a story about why her hair was down when I would much rather her say that she would like me to brush and fix her hair because she likes it. I asked her why she feels she has to manipulate the situation to get her way. ( I realize she can't answer that question, but it is what I said.) She just continued to make up reasons. I told her to stop because she it just lying and going to get her into trouble. She kept trying to tell me different versions of the story. Of course, she says I am not and I didn't take my hair down on purpose. Explain to me how her hair can get messed up traveling 5-10 minutes in the car. She had even wet her hair at home when she was fixing it, so I know it didn't come down on its own. Haylee chimes in and says that Hannah just took it down, it didn't fall. She is the master at keeping a straight face and making eye contact when she is manipulating or lying. It is getting harder and harder to tell the truth from lies. She whines a little and says, "But Momma, I am not lying." It is so hard, because all of our friends believe her and say that she doesn't mean to lie. Obviously, I ignore their opinion.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Book
I am currently reading, The Great Behavior Breakdown by Bryan Post. It is a good book. He references Bruce Perry quite a bit in his book. Bruce Perry is going to be in our state speaking in April. I am very excited to be able to go to the conference. This book by Bryan Post is really helping me renew my parenting skills for traumatized children. It reminded me of some things I knew, but have quit using.
One thing, is the positive and negative cycle. Sometimes I do well changing the negative behavior to positive and diffusing the situation and sometimes I don't. I have really focused on trying to speak to my children in positive ways instead of negative. This really gets hard as the day progresses. My girls seem to struggle more the more positive I try to be. They appear to get more insecure when we are happy. I have read that this can make them feel insecure.
Bryan Post says that love and fear are the two emotions the children function from. We have had two incidences today where Hannah assumed things were said that were not said at all by anyone. Having read the night before about how she is functioning out of fear, I gently corrected her assumptions and tried to promote security. She just assumed these things because in her mind she thought people were being unfair to her. The good thing is the second incident was with me and she was able to partially verbalize what she was thinking. If I can keep her from entering the fight or flight mode, she is getting better a talking. If I can't keep her from entering, we are can't make progress until we can help her regulate again. I am working on getting to her eye level and watching my tone of voice. I was very good at this when they first came to live with us, but over time I have forgotten to do this when correcting them.
I have not read very far in the book, but am looking forward to reading a little bit tonight. I don't have time to read often, but I am trying to read some when I get in the bed at night. However, I usually don't make it long before I am sound asleep.
I will let you know more as I read further in the book. Have any of you read this book?
One thing, is the positive and negative cycle. Sometimes I do well changing the negative behavior to positive and diffusing the situation and sometimes I don't. I have really focused on trying to speak to my children in positive ways instead of negative. This really gets hard as the day progresses. My girls seem to struggle more the more positive I try to be. They appear to get more insecure when we are happy. I have read that this can make them feel insecure.
Bryan Post says that love and fear are the two emotions the children function from. We have had two incidences today where Hannah assumed things were said that were not said at all by anyone. Having read the night before about how she is functioning out of fear, I gently corrected her assumptions and tried to promote security. She just assumed these things because in her mind she thought people were being unfair to her. The good thing is the second incident was with me and she was able to partially verbalize what she was thinking. If I can keep her from entering the fight or flight mode, she is getting better a talking. If I can't keep her from entering, we are can't make progress until we can help her regulate again. I am working on getting to her eye level and watching my tone of voice. I was very good at this when they first came to live with us, but over time I have forgotten to do this when correcting them.
I have not read very far in the book, but am looking forward to reading a little bit tonight. I don't have time to read often, but I am trying to read some when I get in the bed at night. However, I usually don't make it long before I am sound asleep.
I will let you know more as I read further in the book. Have any of you read this book?
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Swim Team
We had an out of town swim meet today. I am so proud of all of my children!! However, Haylee and Hannah have improved so much!! It is truly amazing. Two girls that could barely keep their heads above water 21 months ago are competing in swim meets and doing really well!
Haylee is either really "on" or really "not one." Today was a really "on" day and she looked great. She was focused and determined. They both really improved their times. Their confidence was so amazing today. I talked to all of the kids on the way to the meet about how a lot of younger kids that have never competed will be there. Be alert and help them if needed. All five kids were very helpful. I was helping get the newer kids to their blocks to swim. I was encouraging a little girl to finish her race. I looked over a few lanes and our Coach had asked Haylee to jump in and help a little guy swimming finish his freestyle race. It was precious!! What a confidence builder for the Coach to ask Haylee to help a little guy not much smaller than her in the pool!!! It was such a God moment! I wish I had a picture. He finished the race with Haylee encouraging him and swimming next to him. God is so good!!
All five kids swam best times and had fun.
On the hard days, it is so helpful to reflect on how far the girls have come. God is so good to us!!
Haylee is either really "on" or really "not one." Today was a really "on" day and she looked great. She was focused and determined. They both really improved their times. Their confidence was so amazing today. I talked to all of the kids on the way to the meet about how a lot of younger kids that have never competed will be there. Be alert and help them if needed. All five kids were very helpful. I was helping get the newer kids to their blocks to swim. I was encouraging a little girl to finish her race. I looked over a few lanes and our Coach had asked Haylee to jump in and help a little guy swimming finish his freestyle race. It was precious!! What a confidence builder for the Coach to ask Haylee to help a little guy not much smaller than her in the pool!!! It was such a God moment! I wish I had a picture. He finished the race with Haylee encouraging him and swimming next to him. God is so good!!
All five kids swam best times and had fun.
On the hard days, it is so helpful to reflect on how far the girls have come. God is so good to us!!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Fight or Flight
I haven't posted in a long time because I have had a lot of things on my heart and mind. I struggle with what to share and not to share.
Over the last year and eight months there have been times when I have been talking with Hannah about something she has done wrong. She is in trouble, to put it plainly. While I am talking to her, her eyes begin to change. During these times, I have often wondered if she was about "to blow". She never has. I have been waiting for it to come. Well, last weekend we were at a camp for a family retreat. We were in a hotel type room. I was in one with the girls and my husband was in one with the boys. Well, she broke trust with one of her sisters. Haylee and I both asked her not to tell. Of course, she tells the girls in her class as soon as they ask. She gave in to be accepted by these girls. Anyway, while I was sitting on the bed talking to her, her eyes changed again. I had Haylee come sit next to her and Hannah's eyes were as dilated as they could be. Haylee's were normal.
So, some friends of mine tell me at breakfast the next morning that this is a fight or flight response. Wow! I looked it up and they are correct. So, now to we call this PTSD? So, now anytime I correct her I look for this symptom. It seems to happen over big and small things. When I see this response, knowing it is out of her control, I watch for her to check out on me and I try to help her feel secure. Sometimes she still answers my questions and is comprhending, but sometimes not as much. However, don't I still need to hold her accountable for her choices?
I have really been struggling with this since the God has revealed more of the picture to me. I am questioning the way I parent. How I handle her and on and on...
Our counselor said there is usually a specific event that causes PTSD. Could it be the horrible movies her BP's let her watch as a very young child? She does have nightmares about the characters in the movies?
Do you notice this in your children that are from abusive and neglectful homes?
She is making more and more choices against our rules. She is doing things opposite right after I tell her not to do something. For example, I said, "Do not eat your candy." "I have already opened it." I said,"Okay, don't eat your candy." The next few seconds and she is eating her candy. Needless to say, I threw the candy out the window. We have had this type thing happening more and more lately.
How do you handle these type incidences? I need help from experienced parents of children from trauma.
Over the last year and eight months there have been times when I have been talking with Hannah about something she has done wrong. She is in trouble, to put it plainly. While I am talking to her, her eyes begin to change. During these times, I have often wondered if she was about "to blow". She never has. I have been waiting for it to come. Well, last weekend we were at a camp for a family retreat. We were in a hotel type room. I was in one with the girls and my husband was in one with the boys. Well, she broke trust with one of her sisters. Haylee and I both asked her not to tell. Of course, she tells the girls in her class as soon as they ask. She gave in to be accepted by these girls. Anyway, while I was sitting on the bed talking to her, her eyes changed again. I had Haylee come sit next to her and Hannah's eyes were as dilated as they could be. Haylee's were normal.
So, some friends of mine tell me at breakfast the next morning that this is a fight or flight response. Wow! I looked it up and they are correct. So, now to we call this PTSD? So, now anytime I correct her I look for this symptom. It seems to happen over big and small things. When I see this response, knowing it is out of her control, I watch for her to check out on me and I try to help her feel secure. Sometimes she still answers my questions and is comprhending, but sometimes not as much. However, don't I still need to hold her accountable for her choices?
I have really been struggling with this since the God has revealed more of the picture to me. I am questioning the way I parent. How I handle her and on and on...
Our counselor said there is usually a specific event that causes PTSD. Could it be the horrible movies her BP's let her watch as a very young child? She does have nightmares about the characters in the movies?
Do you notice this in your children that are from abusive and neglectful homes?
She is making more and more choices against our rules. She is doing things opposite right after I tell her not to do something. For example, I said, "Do not eat your candy." "I have already opened it." I said,"Okay, don't eat your candy." The next few seconds and she is eating her candy. Needless to say, I threw the candy out the window. We have had this type thing happening more and more lately.
How do you handle these type incidences? I need help from experienced parents of children from trauma.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Anger
We are dealing with anger around here. We are trying to find healthy ways for Hannah to release her anger.
I have talked to a counselor we met with prior to finalization and she suggested a few things. She is going to visit our home in early December and meet with each girl alone. This is definitely a new season for all of us. I am remaining calm and trying to love her through her anger. After we discuss the issue, I reassure her that she is safe and secure in our family. She will not be moved again. She is in our family forever. We will love her no matter what she does. She can't make us stop loving her and being her parents. Sometimes this will bring tears to her eyes and sometimes you can see her body relax. I have to remain focused for this to be successful. She is going to have to stay close to me again for awhile. I need this to keep a watchful eye on her and I think she needs this for security.
I have wondered today is she if "fake" to me and her "real" self when I am not around. She knows what not to do in front of me, but does it when I leave the room. This is becoming more and more common.
Her anger is becoming the bottom line for problems lately. She gets mad and doesn't even care about the consequences. Her cause and effect struggles also come into play at this point also.
I am praying that God will heal her hurt places.
I have talked to a counselor we met with prior to finalization and she suggested a few things. She is going to visit our home in early December and meet with each girl alone. This is definitely a new season for all of us. I am remaining calm and trying to love her through her anger. After we discuss the issue, I reassure her that she is safe and secure in our family. She will not be moved again. She is in our family forever. We will love her no matter what she does. She can't make us stop loving her and being her parents. Sometimes this will bring tears to her eyes and sometimes you can see her body relax. I have to remain focused for this to be successful. She is going to have to stay close to me again for awhile. I need this to keep a watchful eye on her and I think she needs this for security.
I have wondered today is she if "fake" to me and her "real" self when I am not around. She knows what not to do in front of me, but does it when I leave the room. This is becoming more and more common.
Her anger is becoming the bottom line for problems lately. She gets mad and doesn't even care about the consequences. Her cause and effect struggles also come into play at this point also.
I am praying that God will heal her hurt places.
Friday, November 11, 2011
A New Day
I am thankful that God gives us a new day to start over! Today is going to be a better day! I usually try to whisper when I am correcting the children. The girls (all three of them) seem to respond better to this. Sometimes, I think it frustrates them because I choose not to raise my voice. It definitely helps keep me calmer as well.
For their birthday, a friend of Haylee and Hannah's gave them each a day to play at her house and eat their favorite things. Hannah is going today and Haylee is going tomorrow. They are very excited. Some of their homeschool friends also swim on the swim team with them. They are developing sweet friendships with them. My heart was warmed the other day when we pulled up to class and some of the girls came running to see them. They wanted to know if they were going to swim team after class. Their mom told me they couldn't wait to get to class and see them. I am happy they are developing their own friendships. Things should go okay at the friends because they will each have one on one time with their friend for a day.
For their birthday, a friend of Haylee and Hannah's gave them each a day to play at her house and eat their favorite things. Hannah is going today and Haylee is going tomorrow. They are very excited. Some of their homeschool friends also swim on the swim team with them. They are developing sweet friendships with them. My heart was warmed the other day when we pulled up to class and some of the girls came running to see them. They wanted to know if they were going to swim team after class. Their mom told me they couldn't wait to get to class and see them. I am happy they are developing their own friendships. Things should go okay at the friends because they will each have one on one time with their friend for a day.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Tomorrow is Day 1, again.
I did so well this morning. I didn't lose my temper. I tried to work with Hannah two different times on grammar and stopped both times so I would not get negative with her. She just wants to be finished and will say whatever, without thinking at all. I stayed neutral with her. I have to have very little emotion to succeed at this. I think she struggled this morning because I was refusing the battle.
Well, they have classes this afternoon. They loaded their swim things and were getting in the car. A little incident occurred and Morgan was hit in the head by the large tailgate on my Sequoia. I am sure it hurt. She came back in crying. We were trying to get out the door so I kissed her head, gave her a hug and we were getting to head out the door when in walks Hannah. I asked why she wasn't in the car and she said she didn't know she was suppose to be. I not so nicely told her she knew she was suppose to be in the car and better get back in. We loaded up and headed out.
I talked Hannah back through the sequence of events leading up to why she was loading up her swim items and getting in the car to go to class. She agreed with everything I said. I asked her why she told me she didn't know she was suppose to be in the car. She said she didn't know. Ugh!! She just told me she did!!!
We went over the events three times before she admitted that she knew she was suppose to be in the car when she told me she didn't know.
About the end of the second time with her telling me she didn't know to get in the car, I lost it. I wasn't friendly anymore. I wasn't necessarily negative in words, but my tone wasn't good.
I don't handle it well when they aren't truthful. She finally said she came in the check on Morgan. That would have been okay. I still would have sent her back to the car, but she wouldn't have been in trouble.
I was so upset and frustrated I stopped at my husbands office on the way to class. He just shook his head when I told him what happened. I asked what I should do. He gently reminded me that I am trying so hard to act positive and neutral that the enemy is going to try to steal my joy and destroy my good intentions. He succeeded. I ended up hurting Hannah and I am totally discouraged.
God is still in control. I am learning a lot about myself in this attitude challenge. I find I don't like the way I act sometimes. This is even more difficult because I want to do it very well, not just halfway.
I will try to finish the day well and start over tomorrow.
Well, they have classes this afternoon. They loaded their swim things and were getting in the car. A little incident occurred and Morgan was hit in the head by the large tailgate on my Sequoia. I am sure it hurt. She came back in crying. We were trying to get out the door so I kissed her head, gave her a hug and we were getting to head out the door when in walks Hannah. I asked why she wasn't in the car and she said she didn't know she was suppose to be. I not so nicely told her she knew she was suppose to be in the car and better get back in. We loaded up and headed out.
I talked Hannah back through the sequence of events leading up to why she was loading up her swim items and getting in the car to go to class. She agreed with everything I said. I asked her why she told me she didn't know she was suppose to be in the car. She said she didn't know. Ugh!! She just told me she did!!!
We went over the events three times before she admitted that she knew she was suppose to be in the car when she told me she didn't know.
About the end of the second time with her telling me she didn't know to get in the car, I lost it. I wasn't friendly anymore. I wasn't necessarily negative in words, but my tone wasn't good.
I don't handle it well when they aren't truthful. She finally said she came in the check on Morgan. That would have been okay. I still would have sent her back to the car, but she wouldn't have been in trouble.
I was so upset and frustrated I stopped at my husbands office on the way to class. He just shook his head when I told him what happened. I asked what I should do. He gently reminded me that I am trying so hard to act positive and neutral that the enemy is going to try to steal my joy and destroy my good intentions. He succeeded. I ended up hurting Hannah and I am totally discouraged.
God is still in control. I am learning a lot about myself in this attitude challenge. I find I don't like the way I act sometimes. This is even more difficult because I want to do it very well, not just halfway.
I will try to finish the day well and start over tomorrow.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Today
Well, I did better today. It wasn't perfect, but everything I said, I evaluated. I am not sure if today was good enough to call Day 1 or not. That is okay because I just want to keep improving.
We had doctor appointments out of town today. All five kids went with me. We went in to the large pet store. The girls wanted to look at the hamsters and birds. The place was empty because it was 10:30am on a school day. I left them looking as the boys and I went to get dog food. We were only gone a few minutes and when we returned, Hannah was trying to open the door to get inside the booth behind the glass where the animals are kept. I couldn't believe it. When asked why,of course she said she wanted to go in there. (Duh, Mom, what a stupid question.) Well, I can say,I didn't lecture or lose my temper. I said that is not a good decision for a ten year old. You will hold my hand and stay next to me the rest of the day. I have heard other blog friends do this, but I have never actually made any of them hold my hand for a long period of time.
Well, she thought it was okay at first. However, we went into a large shoe store next. She discovered it was no fun to be stuck to Mom like glue when the other girls are looking around. (They were within my sight also.) I wasn't negative or ugly. I just made her hold my hand. We left the store and went to eat lunch. I made her get out of the car and hold my hand. She had to sit by me and not choose her seat. This is a big deal for her because she always wants to pick where she sits. It is a control thing with her. During the meal, I had to go to the restroom, so she had to go with me. We survived and did okay. I think it made an impression on her.
I was excited because I contained my emotions even though I couldn't believe what she was trying to do at the pet store. I may be using this form of discipline more with her because it worked well for both of us.
I guess I have finished with Day 1. It may not have been perfect, but I prayed a lot for guidance and understanding towards my girls. I think I did much better than the day before. It is like I tell my children, I tried hard and improved. Tomorrow is a new day.
How is everyone else doing?
However, homeschooling makes this a very interesting challenge. We were out of town most of the day today. I am anxious to see what tomorrow hold for all of us.
We had doctor appointments out of town today. All five kids went with me. We went in to the large pet store. The girls wanted to look at the hamsters and birds. The place was empty because it was 10:30am on a school day. I left them looking as the boys and I went to get dog food. We were only gone a few minutes and when we returned, Hannah was trying to open the door to get inside the booth behind the glass where the animals are kept. I couldn't believe it. When asked why,of course she said she wanted to go in there. (Duh, Mom, what a stupid question.) Well, I can say,I didn't lecture or lose my temper. I said that is not a good decision for a ten year old. You will hold my hand and stay next to me the rest of the day. I have heard other blog friends do this, but I have never actually made any of them hold my hand for a long period of time.
Well, she thought it was okay at first. However, we went into a large shoe store next. She discovered it was no fun to be stuck to Mom like glue when the other girls are looking around. (They were within my sight also.) I wasn't negative or ugly. I just made her hold my hand. We left the store and went to eat lunch. I made her get out of the car and hold my hand. She had to sit by me and not choose her seat. This is a big deal for her because she always wants to pick where she sits. It is a control thing with her. During the meal, I had to go to the restroom, so she had to go with me. We survived and did okay. I think it made an impression on her.
I was excited because I contained my emotions even though I couldn't believe what she was trying to do at the pet store. I may be using this form of discipline more with her because it worked well for both of us.
I guess I have finished with Day 1. It may not have been perfect, but I prayed a lot for guidance and understanding towards my girls. I think I did much better than the day before. It is like I tell my children, I tried hard and improved. Tomorrow is a new day.
How is everyone else doing?
However, homeschooling makes this a very interesting challenge. We were out of town most of the day today. I am anxious to see what tomorrow hold for all of us.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Sick
Hannah hasn't been sick very much since coming to our home about 19 months ago. She had a ruptured ear drum one time. She didn't complain until right before it ruptured. Well, Friday she started saying her throat hurt a little. She had fever all day Saturday and Sunday. It got up to about 102.5. She rarely complained and said her throat was getting better. I told her if she needed me during the night, she could come get me. She was really confused. She kept asking questions. I told her if she was hurting or feeling really bad, she could come get me. I told her she could have more medicine about 2:30am. She asked if she should come get me at 2:30. Bless her heart. I don't think she has had anyone to care for her during the night. I wonder if she cried out when she was little and was ignored or got in trouble. It breaks my heart.
I took her to the doctor today and she has strep throat and a bad ear infection. The doctor was concerned because she said her ear doesn't hurt. He said I need to watch her in the future because of her high tolerance for pain. If Tucker, Alex or Morgan had a high fever, they would be on the couch wrapped up in a blanket. She did school today. She hasn't acted sick. I gave her some more medicine for her fever this afternoon and she really didn't want to take it. She acted afraid to take it. I reminded her that if she needs medicine and takes it as prescribed, it is okay.
I hope she gets better soon. I also hope no one else gets sick.
I took her to the doctor today and she has strep throat and a bad ear infection. The doctor was concerned because she said her ear doesn't hurt. He said I need to watch her in the future because of her high tolerance for pain. If Tucker, Alex or Morgan had a high fever, they would be on the couch wrapped up in a blanket. She did school today. She hasn't acted sick. I gave her some more medicine for her fever this afternoon and she really didn't want to take it. She acted afraid to take it. I reminded her that if she needs medicine and takes it as prescribed, it is okay.
I hope she gets better soon. I also hope no one else gets sick.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Success...for one
Morgan's best friend turned eleven last week. She had a spend the night party. She also had a spend the night party last year. Both years she has invited all three girls. Last year, we didn't let the twi*ns spend the night. We didn't feel like they were ready. This year I talked to the mother a long time about what to watch for and to expect. We decided to let them try to spend the night.
They all three stayed all night. Morgan came home happy with them and not complaining which means they did okay. I have seen some pictures from the party and they all looked happy. Hannah ran out to me the next morning very proud. She said, " I did it and didn't have any bad dreams!" She was very excited and proud. She should be! I am very happy for her this is a big step. I was really only worried about her. She had a great day yesterday after the party. She is doing very well right now.
However, Haylee didn't do so well yesterday. She had a great time at the party. I knew she would. One of her good friends also spent the night, so I knew she would be fine. Yesterday was not a good day for her. She disobeyed on a very simple thing. I told her not to do something and the next thing I know, she is doing it. She said she wanted to do it and so she did. Ugh!! Then she was writing scripture as part of the punishment for disobedience. I specifically told her she wasn't to play or watch TV until she was finished. I find her in the hallway watching the movie Hannah and Morgan are watching. Ugh...again. She finished her scripture and played for the afternoon. We all watched a movie last night and she had to go to bed early and not participate in the popcorn and movie. I am so sad about this. I guess she is comfortable enough in our home now that she is starting to test. I wonder if her testing yesterday was because the boundaries at the party weren't as strict. She wanted to know if she could do the same at home.
Lately, most of her problems have revolved around food. I have been praying for God to show me what is going on. I talked to her about the fact that she always has plenty of food here and she knows she will be provided the next meal as well. She agreed with me. I am praying God will give me wisdom regarding this issue.
They all three stayed all night. Morgan came home happy with them and not complaining which means they did okay. I have seen some pictures from the party and they all looked happy. Hannah ran out to me the next morning very proud. She said, " I did it and didn't have any bad dreams!" She was very excited and proud. She should be! I am very happy for her this is a big step. I was really only worried about her. She had a great day yesterday after the party. She is doing very well right now.
However, Haylee didn't do so well yesterday. She had a great time at the party. I knew she would. One of her good friends also spent the night, so I knew she would be fine. Yesterday was not a good day for her. She disobeyed on a very simple thing. I told her not to do something and the next thing I know, she is doing it. She said she wanted to do it and so she did. Ugh!! Then she was writing scripture as part of the punishment for disobedience. I specifically told her she wasn't to play or watch TV until she was finished. I find her in the hallway watching the movie Hannah and Morgan are watching. Ugh...again. She finished her scripture and played for the afternoon. We all watched a movie last night and she had to go to bed early and not participate in the popcorn and movie. I am so sad about this. I guess she is comfortable enough in our home now that she is starting to test. I wonder if her testing yesterday was because the boundaries at the party weren't as strict. She wanted to know if she could do the same at home.
Lately, most of her problems have revolved around food. I have been praying for God to show me what is going on. I talked to her about the fact that she always has plenty of food here and she knows she will be provided the next meal as well. She agreed with me. I am praying God will give me wisdom regarding this issue.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Struggling...
Is it me or her?
We have had a few difficult days around here. Hannah is struggling and so am I . I don't know if I am the problem or if I have a reason to be struggling. She is holding her own in school. She is doing well with old math concepts, but struggling with the new ones. After about three days of reteaching, she usually gets the concept. I am okay with that. We have developed a pattern and it works.
We had a weird occurance a few days ago about a wash cloth. I know that sounds really stupid. I asked a simple question and it turned into something big. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so in tune to what my kids are doing. I wish I was just clueless at times. She got really defensive about what she had been doing. Anyway, what she finally told me she did was not very good hygiene. The more I thought about it, I wondered if she was lying to cover something else. I have thought about it for a few days. I am not sure of the truth. I questioned her again about the truth. She begged me to believe her. I want to trust her and believe her so bad. I have an uneasy feeling about the situation. The story she gave is so odd, I wonder if she is started lying to cover up what she really did and made a really weird story up as I questioned her.
Her nightmares have become more frequent in the last few weeks. Last night, the dream was pretty bad. (What person allows their toddler to watch horror movies??) I am trying to find a pattern to her dreams. What is she feeling when she goes to bed? How was her day? Good or bad? Did she get in trouble late in the afternoon or evening?
I believe if you tell one lie, it gets easier and easier to tell more. I wonder if she has started a snowball effect. I wonder if she cracked the door for Satan and therefore the dreams are bad again.
She got really frustrated because she couldn't get the TV to turn on to watch a DVR'd show. We have shown her and shown her. She went to her bed when she gave up. She has a strong attachment to TV. It is really odd. I don't see it in any of my other children. They all enjoy TV, but her interest is different. I went by her room and saw she was upset and told her to rest in her bed to calm down. She of course didn't like this. She historically makes poor choices when she gets in this mode, so I was giving her time to regulate herself.
Many little things are happening. She it testing the boundaries. It isn't big things, but lots of little things. I tell her not to do something and she goes and does it. ie: Stay here until after finish our time together (our group time in the morning to start school) before you start the dishes. She walks to the kitchen and puts a glass in the dishwasher. What? I asked her why she did that. She said because she wanted to. Ugh!!
Please pray for me to have a clear picture of what is going on. She struggles with attachment to me. She appears closer to my husband at times. I wonder if it because I am with her all day long.
We are struggling now. Please pray. I love all of my children. I love Hannah. I don't know what is going on with us. Why am I struggling so?
We have had a few difficult days around here. Hannah is struggling and so am I . I don't know if I am the problem or if I have a reason to be struggling. She is holding her own in school. She is doing well with old math concepts, but struggling with the new ones. After about three days of reteaching, she usually gets the concept. I am okay with that. We have developed a pattern and it works.
We had a weird occurance a few days ago about a wash cloth. I know that sounds really stupid. I asked a simple question and it turned into something big. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so in tune to what my kids are doing. I wish I was just clueless at times. She got really defensive about what she had been doing. Anyway, what she finally told me she did was not very good hygiene. The more I thought about it, I wondered if she was lying to cover something else. I have thought about it for a few days. I am not sure of the truth. I questioned her again about the truth. She begged me to believe her. I want to trust her and believe her so bad. I have an uneasy feeling about the situation. The story she gave is so odd, I wonder if she is started lying to cover up what she really did and made a really weird story up as I questioned her.
Her nightmares have become more frequent in the last few weeks. Last night, the dream was pretty bad. (What person allows their toddler to watch horror movies??) I am trying to find a pattern to her dreams. What is she feeling when she goes to bed? How was her day? Good or bad? Did she get in trouble late in the afternoon or evening?
I believe if you tell one lie, it gets easier and easier to tell more. I wonder if she has started a snowball effect. I wonder if she cracked the door for Satan and therefore the dreams are bad again.
She got really frustrated because she couldn't get the TV to turn on to watch a DVR'd show. We have shown her and shown her. She went to her bed when she gave up. She has a strong attachment to TV. It is really odd. I don't see it in any of my other children. They all enjoy TV, but her interest is different. I went by her room and saw she was upset and told her to rest in her bed to calm down. She of course didn't like this. She historically makes poor choices when she gets in this mode, so I was giving her time to regulate herself.
Many little things are happening. She it testing the boundaries. It isn't big things, but lots of little things. I tell her not to do something and she goes and does it. ie: Stay here until after finish our time together (our group time in the morning to start school) before you start the dishes. She walks to the kitchen and puts a glass in the dishwasher. What? I asked her why she did that. She said because she wanted to. Ugh!!
Please pray for me to have a clear picture of what is going on. She struggles with attachment to me. She appears closer to my husband at times. I wonder if it because I am with her all day long.
We are struggling now. Please pray. I love all of my children. I love Hannah. I don't know what is going on with us. Why am I struggling so?
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Orphans
A group of people from our church went on a mission trip to Peru last week. They spoke at church last night about their trip. It sounds like many lives were touched during their trip, as well as their own. During their presentation they talked about the children at the orphanage they visited.
They spoke of how happy the children were to have visitors. How they just clung to them and wanted to hold their hands. How they wanted so bad to be loved. When the group left, the children asked them not to forget them, to please come back. The group didn't have plans to return, but ended up working another visit in during their trip. The kids were thrilled to see them again. They were glad they weren't forgotten. They spoke about how these kids need security and a family. Most of them may never have a family. All of the things they said about these children, I could relate too.
I picture my girls the first time I saw them. They clung to us the first time we met them. They wanted to hold our hands and not let go. We went to a local fast food restaurant and they wanted to ride with us. We visited with them for about three hours and then left. They didn't want us to leave them that day. They told us later they were worried we wouldn't come back. They wanted a forever home very badly.
They came to our house for a visit later in the week. They stayed three nights and we took them back to their foster family. I remember Hannah gettting in the foster mother's van and quietly crying. She didn't want us to leave her. She was afraid we wouldn't return. She cried the next few days alot while she was at the foster home. I can only imagine what she was thinking because she did break every rule possible while she was here the few days. She didn't believe we were coming back. When they first came they wanted to hold our hands often. They immediately called us Mom and Dad with little meaning. Now, it has meaning to them.
I am so thankful that God blessed us with our precious girls. It isn't always a fun or easy journey, but it is God's plan for our family. I am glad that we were able to provide a loving secure home for Haylee and Hannah. I am so happy they are not children still hoping and waiting for a forever family. So many children are still waiting. Some may never find their forever family. I hope we can continue to teach them to have a heart for their heavenly father.
My husband just walked in...so...we are off to Cullman!!
It took them a while to believe they were really going to stay forever in our home.
They spoke of how happy the children were to have visitors. How they just clung to them and wanted to hold their hands. How they wanted so bad to be loved. When the group left, the children asked them not to forget them, to please come back. The group didn't have plans to return, but ended up working another visit in during their trip. The kids were thrilled to see them again. They were glad they weren't forgotten. They spoke about how these kids need security and a family. Most of them may never have a family. All of the things they said about these children, I could relate too.
I picture my girls the first time I saw them. They clung to us the first time we met them. They wanted to hold our hands and not let go. We went to a local fast food restaurant and they wanted to ride with us. We visited with them for about three hours and then left. They didn't want us to leave them that day. They told us later they were worried we wouldn't come back. They wanted a forever home very badly.
They came to our house for a visit later in the week. They stayed three nights and we took them back to their foster family. I remember Hannah gettting in the foster mother's van and quietly crying. She didn't want us to leave her. She was afraid we wouldn't return. She cried the next few days alot while she was at the foster home. I can only imagine what she was thinking because she did break every rule possible while she was here the few days. She didn't believe we were coming back. When they first came they wanted to hold our hands often. They immediately called us Mom and Dad with little meaning. Now, it has meaning to them.
I am so thankful that God blessed us with our precious girls. It isn't always a fun or easy journey, but it is God's plan for our family. I am glad that we were able to provide a loving secure home for Haylee and Hannah. I am so happy they are not children still hoping and waiting for a forever family. So many children are still waiting. Some may never find their forever family. I hope we can continue to teach them to have a heart for their heavenly father.
My husband just walked in...so...we are off to Cullman!!
It took them a while to believe they were really going to stay forever in our home.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Pleased
I haven't posted in soooo long!! I have so much to catch up on...Morgan's camp, Elliott and Tucker's father/son retreat in Texas, the beach and Boy Scout Camp. I don't know where to begin, so I will begin with a story from Bible School this past week. The truth culminated today.
The boys were at scout camp this past week. The girls went to Bible School each morning for three hours. Well, the first day Hannah came home saying this boy was mean. I was surprised because they are friends with him. He has been on our swim team for a while. He is a nice boy. I asked them to tell me what happened. She kept telling me he was in her face and she told him to just leave her alone. He also made fun of them in some other ways. Another boy that is their age and a good friend of ours walked by and told him to leave her alone. I was surprised about the problem. I told her to nicely ask him to leave her alone if he bothers her again. Each day she would tell me he wouldn't leave her alone. By the end of the week, she said he was being nice to her.
The mother of the little boy that defended her couldn't really get to the bottom of the story either. Well, I saw the Mom of the "mean" boy at the swim meet in our town yesterday. I wasn't planning on talking to her, but passed her in the hallway and spoke to her. She wasn't happy to hear he had been ugly to her. She went and talked to him.
Well, Hannah didn't give me the whole story. He had accidentally bumped her or stepped on her foot or something during the games. During snack time, he was trying to apologize to her for hurting her. He was doing what he should be doing. She refused to accept his apology. She told him to get away and leave her alone. She put her hand and arm up (like you are saying stop) and refused to hear him. She was wrong! After she acted this way, he lost his temper and said the ugly things. These kids are only 9 and 10. They are still learning. The part I am upset over is that Hannah didn't tell the whole truth to me. All week long they had issues. Well, now I know why. This child is nice. I should have followed my thinking earlier.
Well, my husband and I had a talk with her today. We explained that she broke our trust. We thought we could trust her and talked to the child's mother about the incident. We defended her and we didn't have the entire story. He was wrong also, but she provoked him. If she had forgiven him immediately, the week would have been much happier for everyone. We told her that we couldn't trust her completely anymore. If she is accused of acting a certain way now, we may believe the other person because they can be trusted. She had to write a letter to the boy asking forgiveness and explaining that she has lost the trust of her parents.
The good news is she wrote the letter quickly and well. We prepared it to mail and she went to play. The HAPPY part is that she came back in a few minutes later and said that she was sorry she didn't tell me earlier in the week. She said she felt like God was telling her to tell me and she didn't obey. She cried and we prayed and she asked God to forgive her. I believe it was truthful and from her heart. I told her I am proud that she apologized to me without being prompted. I am glad she did follow her heart with the promptings today.
I told the story to Haylee and she said now it all makes sense.
I am very pleased that God touched her heart and she obeyed today.
The boys were at scout camp this past week. The girls went to Bible School each morning for three hours. Well, the first day Hannah came home saying this boy was mean. I was surprised because they are friends with him. He has been on our swim team for a while. He is a nice boy. I asked them to tell me what happened. She kept telling me he was in her face and she told him to just leave her alone. He also made fun of them in some other ways. Another boy that is their age and a good friend of ours walked by and told him to leave her alone. I was surprised about the problem. I told her to nicely ask him to leave her alone if he bothers her again. Each day she would tell me he wouldn't leave her alone. By the end of the week, she said he was being nice to her.
The mother of the little boy that defended her couldn't really get to the bottom of the story either. Well, I saw the Mom of the "mean" boy at the swim meet in our town yesterday. I wasn't planning on talking to her, but passed her in the hallway and spoke to her. She wasn't happy to hear he had been ugly to her. She went and talked to him.
Well, Hannah didn't give me the whole story. He had accidentally bumped her or stepped on her foot or something during the games. During snack time, he was trying to apologize to her for hurting her. He was doing what he should be doing. She refused to accept his apology. She told him to get away and leave her alone. She put her hand and arm up (like you are saying stop) and refused to hear him. She was wrong! After she acted this way, he lost his temper and said the ugly things. These kids are only 9 and 10. They are still learning. The part I am upset over is that Hannah didn't tell the whole truth to me. All week long they had issues. Well, now I know why. This child is nice. I should have followed my thinking earlier.
Well, my husband and I had a talk with her today. We explained that she broke our trust. We thought we could trust her and talked to the child's mother about the incident. We defended her and we didn't have the entire story. He was wrong also, but she provoked him. If she had forgiven him immediately, the week would have been much happier for everyone. We told her that we couldn't trust her completely anymore. If she is accused of acting a certain way now, we may believe the other person because they can be trusted. She had to write a letter to the boy asking forgiveness and explaining that she has lost the trust of her parents.
The good news is she wrote the letter quickly and well. We prepared it to mail and she went to play. The HAPPY part is that she came back in a few minutes later and said that she was sorry she didn't tell me earlier in the week. She said she felt like God was telling her to tell me and she didn't obey. She cried and we prayed and she asked God to forgive her. I believe it was truthful and from her heart. I told her I am proud that she apologized to me without being prompted. I am glad she did follow her heart with the promptings today.
I told the story to Haylee and she said now it all makes sense.
I am very pleased that God touched her heart and she obeyed today.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Wild and stressed
Haylee and Hannah are riding the tube behind my dad's boat. This pictures says it all. Haylee is riding like a wild and crazy woman. Hannah is hanging on for her life.
They both enjoyed being at the lake this past weekend.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Camp
Morgan had a wonderful time at camp!!! The transition for all of us was difficult today. The twins have been following around Alex at my parents lake house this weekend. He is tired of it I believe. Well, today they attached to Morgan again. This was hard for especially because she was so tired.
The girls would like to go to camp like Morgan. They aren't ready. They haven't attached nearly enough to even consider them spending a night away except with my parents or my in-laws. They still have nightmares. They aren't as regular, but we do have them, especially when we aren't at home. Hannah was afraid of all of the water rides. She watched as she stood and chewed on her fingers. We went the pool and she did play on the water slide. Haylee loved the little zip line and the diving board and water slide at the pool. Haylee kept wandering off from us as we were walking around. She would get so lost.
After they swam, they put on dry clothes and we went to the arcade. The girls have never played many video games, so they didn't know what to do. By this time, they were very overwhelmed. I could tell it was too much. We then went to the trampolines. They last there about 1 minute. All of our group went to get a soda and the kids began playing a game in a small area enclosed by a half wall. I was getting a drink and wasn't paying much attention. When I walked up, I heard a girl ask Hannah is she was going to play. Hannah said yes. She was standing there a scared look with her hands in her mouth. I think they were playing a type of dodge ball. Well, they started playing and the ball hit her about three times in the legs. She just stood there petrified. I told her to get out because she isn't playing. She argued and said she was. Whatever!! She got out and was mad at me.
Hannah would be absolutely miserable at camp. Haylee would probably stay in trouble for not paying attention and getting lost. We will have to try to explain the best we can why they aren't ready if any of our kids go next summer. I did tell all of them in the car today that decision whether anyone attends camp is based on each person as an individual, not as a group. Just because one person attends, doesn't mean everyone gets to go. I explained that everyone is different and Daddy and I have to evaluate each child abilities separately.
What a tough thing. I am sure it appears rough, but it is the way it has to be for us.
The girls would like to go to camp like Morgan. They aren't ready. They haven't attached nearly enough to even consider them spending a night away except with my parents or my in-laws. They still have nightmares. They aren't as regular, but we do have them, especially when we aren't at home. Hannah was afraid of all of the water rides. She watched as she stood and chewed on her fingers. We went the pool and she did play on the water slide. Haylee loved the little zip line and the diving board and water slide at the pool. Haylee kept wandering off from us as we were walking around. She would get so lost.
After they swam, they put on dry clothes and we went to the arcade. The girls have never played many video games, so they didn't know what to do. By this time, they were very overwhelmed. I could tell it was too much. We then went to the trampolines. They last there about 1 minute. All of our group went to get a soda and the kids began playing a game in a small area enclosed by a half wall. I was getting a drink and wasn't paying much attention. When I walked up, I heard a girl ask Hannah is she was going to play. Hannah said yes. She was standing there a scared look with her hands in her mouth. I think they were playing a type of dodge ball. Well, they started playing and the ball hit her about three times in the legs. She just stood there petrified. I told her to get out because she isn't playing. She argued and said she was. Whatever!! She got out and was mad at me.
Hannah would be absolutely miserable at camp. Haylee would probably stay in trouble for not paying attention and getting lost. We will have to try to explain the best we can why they aren't ready if any of our kids go next summer. I did tell all of them in the car today that decision whether anyone attends camp is based on each person as an individual, not as a group. Just because one person attends, doesn't mean everyone gets to go. I explained that everyone is different and Daddy and I have to evaluate each child abilities separately.
What a tough thing. I am sure it appears rough, but it is the way it has to be for us.
Birthday Party
I took the girls to the birthday party last week. I was anxious about the whole thing. I went in with the girls and the Mom in charge started telling me the plans for the scavenger hunt. It was great! They were not going in stores. I was so relieved! They went to an older ladies house and gave her hugs and she told about her birthdays during her lifetime. It was her pastors mother-in-law. They went to the local food bank and donated can goods. The lady explained how by helping feed the needy they are acting as Jesus would. They also went to a new pastor homeschooling family and built pyramids in their yard and rang the doorbell and welcomed them to town. I did leave them and she said they did well. Of course, they were on the back porch when I arrived to pick them up and I could hear them above everybody. She said they weren't the only loud girls there.
I was very happy they did well. Baby steps...
I was very happy they did well. Baby steps...
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